Gig: Jan. 7th @ 9PM – JB McGinnes

I heard through the grapevine that JB McGinnes in sunny New Castle, DE has a reputation for being a metal club. So why might they be courting HOT BREAKFAST! to grace their stage?

BECAUSE WE ARE EFFING METAL.

Lesser bands need to prove their metalosity with obvious things like distortion, black leather, sleeves of tattoos and pigeon sacrifice– but not us. We’ve got a freakin’ life to lead here Chachi — a life of ROCK — and all we need are Matt’s massive guns and Jill’s teeth-baring rock scowl (See Figure A, below) and whaddaya know: Yngwie Malmsteen is quivvering like a scared, wet chihuahua.

So yeah, it’s true. We’re playing at JB McGinnes in New Castle, DE on Friday, January 7th at 9pm. We really actually start playing at 9; not “rock and roll 9” which often means “sometime around 10:30.” So if you don’t want to miss the hurricane-esque rocking, then you’d best be on time, my friend.

In fact, what the hell… show up early. Camp out for fucksake. This way you will be guaranteed to be there when we finally achieve WORLD DOMINATION. It will happen, my friends. Oh yes… and our highly-paid statisticians and Reagan-approved astrologers tell us it is occurring that weekend. You don’t want to miss being part of history, do you? NO YOU DO NOT.

Three other bands will be closing for us: The Joe Trainor Trio, The Miles, and Villains Like You. We would like to commend these bands for having the courage to follow us. We admire chutzpah.

Your pal,

Jill