The Millennium Music Conference is happening for the 18th time this year, but this year’s conference is special: It has 200% more Hot Breakfast! than it has ever had in past years.
Full disclosure: We tend to approach music conferences with a bit of skepticism. Questions like: “Why is a giant music conference in Harrisburg PA?” and “Why are we going to Harrisburg in the middle of winter?” and “Let’s face it: Music industry people are not going to be interested in two 40-year-olds with an acoustic guitar and a megaphone. Why are we going to this?” and “The two performance slots they gave us are both at Stupid O’Clock in the Acoustic Loser Lounge. If nobody is going to come see us, why are we doing this?” and “We’re not getting paid for these performances… in fact, we’re paying to play there. If our goal in 2014 was to try to make our living off of being musicians, isn’t paying to play counter-intuitive?” and “All of the correspondence we’ve received from the Millennium people have been misspelled, difficult to decipher, and not exactly confidence-instilling. If they can’t pay for a proofreader, how seriously are they taking this?” and “If you google the conference, the only articles written about it are for local community newspapers. If no big newspapers or music industry or pop culture magazines seem to cover it, it’s clear we’re not going to get any press… so why are we going?” and “In addition to the showcases we’ll be playing (to nobody) in the evenings, we can attend conferences during the day to learn things we kinda already know.”
And to be honest, we don’t have good answers to those questions.
So fuck it. We’re not going.
This post was supposed to attempted rebuttals to those questions, but we’ve got nuthin’.
Best of luck to everyone who is going!